When Spirituality Becomes a Checklist: How to Realign with What Truly Matters
Hey everyone,
I wanted to talk about something that’s been on my mind lately—when spirituality, something meant to be deeply personal and freeing, starts feeling like just another box to check off on our endless to-do list. You know what I’m talking about. The moments when your spiritual practice, instead of being a source of peace and connection, becomes yet another way to measure your worth, to see how well you stack up against your ideal self.
It’s a slippery slope, one that many of us find ourselves on at some point. We start out with good intentions—seeking inner peace, a deeper connection, maybe even some clarity in this chaotic world. But somewhere along the way, spirituality becomes one more thing we feel we need to perfect. It turns into a performance, a competition with ourselves or others, to see how "enlightened" or "worthy" we can be.
The Perfection Trap
Here’s the thing: when spirituality becomes about perfection, we’ve missed the point. The true essence of spirituality isn’t about being perfect; it’s about being real. It’s about accepting ourselves as we are, flaws and all, and finding peace in that acceptance. When we start using our spiritual practices to bridge the gap between our actual self and our ideal self, we’re no longer engaging with spirituality in a meaningful way—we’re just adding another layer of pressure to our already stressed-out lives.
This perfection trap is sneaky. It disguises itself as self-improvement, as growth, as the pursuit of becoming our best selves. But in reality, it’s just another way of keeping us stuck, of making us feel like we’re never quite good enough. And that’s the opposite of what spirituality is supposed to be.
Realigning with What Matters
So, what do we do when we realize we’ve lost the plot? When spirituality has become just another task to master, another standard to meet? We step back. We reset. And we realign with what truly matters.
The ancient concept of "repentance" might sound old-fashioned, but it’s incredibly relevant here. Repentance, in its truest sense, isn’t about guilt or shame—it’s about turning around, about reorienting ourselves towards what’s true and real. It’s about acknowledging that we’ve strayed from the path and making a conscious decision to return to what’s meaningful.
How to Get Back on Track
Here’s how you can begin to realign your spiritual practice with what truly matters:
Release the Pressure: Let go of the need to be perfect. Spirituality isn’t about achieving a certain state; it’s about experiencing life as it is. Allow yourself to be imperfect, to have messy, unstructured moments of connection.
Reconnect with the Why: Remember why you started your spiritual journey in the first place. Was it for peace, for connection, for understanding? Reconnect with that original intention and let it guide you back to a more authentic practice.
Simplify Your Practice: Strip back any unnecessary rituals or habits that have become more about performance than connection. Focus on what brings you genuine peace and fulfillment, even if it’s as simple as taking a deep breath and being present in the moment.
Embrace Vulnerability: True spirituality involves vulnerability—being honest with yourself about where you’re at, what you’re struggling with, and what you need. Allow yourself to be vulnerable in your practice, knowing that it’s through this vulnerability that true growth happens.
Spirituality isn’t about getting everything right or being perfect. It’s about finding peace in the present moment, connecting with something greater than ourselves, and being real with who we are. If you’ve found yourself caught in the perfection trap, it’s time to take a step back, reset, and realign with what truly matters.
Remember, the journey isn’t about being the best—it’s about being true to yourself, wherever you are on the path.
With Love,
Gene Quiocho
